Jail Baste

Liability Waiver

Effective Date: July 4, 2024 | Last Updated: September 3, 2025

Generated by Terminal

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1. INDEMNIFICATION

If you fail to indemnify us properly, we reserve the right to be very disappointed in you.

This indemnification survives: termination of services, your death, the dissolution of Jail Baste, and the eventual heat death of the universe.

You will indemnify us for claims arising from: your actions, your inactions, your presence, your absence, and your general existence.

Indemnification includes: legal fees, settlement costs, judgments, fines, regulatory penalties, and the cost of reputation repair PR campaigns.

2. MEDICAL RELEASE

In case of injury, you authorize Jail Baste to seek medical treatment on your behalf, which you will pay for, because we're definitely not covering that.

You release all medical information to Jail Baste that may be relevant to your care, which we will store securely and only share with our analytics team.

You acknowledge that Jail Baste is not a medical provider, and any medical advice we give should be ignored immediately.

3. WAIVER OF CLAIMS

This waiver includes claims under: tort law, contract law, statutory law, maritime law, bird law, and any law invented in the future specifically to address our behavior.

You agree not to initiate lawsuits, join class actions, file complaints with regulatory agencies, write angry Yelp reviews, or subtweet us.

You waive the right to bring any legal action against Jail Baste, even if we did something really, obviously, spectacularly wrong. Especially then.

Should you bring a claim despite this waiver, you agree to pay all legal fees, court costs, and the emotional toll on our legal team.

4. RELEASE OF LIABILITY

This release extends to: Jail Baste, its officers, directors, employees, volunteers, interns, that guy who sometimes helps with IT, and anyone else we can think of.

This release is binding upon you, your heirs, your executors, your administrators, and your descendants for the next seven generations.

By releasing Jail Baste from liability, you also release us from the obligation to feel bad about it.

5. ASSUMPTION OF RISK

You voluntarily assume all risks of injury, illness, or death that may result from participating in our services. Voluntarily, we said. This is definitely voluntary.

By signing this waiver, you accept responsibility for your own safety, the safety of your belongings, and the safety of your immortal soul (if applicable).

6. ACKNOWLEDGMENT OF RISK

You acknowledge that no activity is completely safe, especially activities we're involved in, which is why this waiver exists in the first place.

Environmental risks include: weather, temperature, humidity, air quality, cosmic radiation, Mercury retrograde, and whatever else we can blame for incidents.

You acknowledge that participating in Jail Baste's services involves inherent risks, including but not limited to: physical injury, emotional distress, financial ruin, and discovering uncomfortable truths about yourself.

Risks may include: slipping, falling, tripping, stumbling, tumbling, toppling, plummeting, and any other synonym for 'gravity winning.'