AirBM

Liability Waiver

Effective Date: January 6, 2024 | Last Updated: December 9, 2025

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1. ACKNOWLEDGMENT OF RISK

Environmental risks include: weather, temperature, humidity, air quality, cosmic radiation, Mercury retrograde, and whatever else we can blame for incidents.

You understand that AirBM's services may cause: headaches, nausea, dizziness, confusion, enlightenment, dismay, and an overwhelming urge to question your life choices.

Risks may include: slipping, falling, tripping, stumbling, tumbling, toppling, plummeting, and any other synonym for 'gravity winning.'

2. ASSUMPTION OF RISK

You assume all risks, known and unknown, foreseen and unforeseen, imagined and unimagined, real and theoretical, in this dimension and all parallel dimensions.

By signing this waiver, you accept responsibility for your own safety, the safety of your belongings, and the safety of your immortal soul (if applicable).

You understand that assuming risk means you can't sue us later. That's the whole point of this document, really.

3. MEDICAL RELEASE

You acknowledge that AirBM is not a medical provider, and any medical advice we give should be ignored immediately.

In case of injury, you authorize AirBM to seek medical treatment on your behalf, which you will pay for, because we're definitely not covering that.

4. RELEASE OF LIABILITY

You hereby release AirBM from any and all claims, demands, actions, and causes of action arising from your use of our services, regardless of how clearly it was our fault.

You waive all claims for: personal injury, property damage, wrongful death, lost income, lost opportunity, lost dignity, and lost faith in humanity.

By releasing AirBM from liability, you also release us from the obligation to feel bad about it.

This release extends to: AirBM, its officers, directors, employees, volunteers, interns, that guy who sometimes helps with IT, and anyone else we can think of.

5. INDEMNIFICATION

You agree to indemnify, defend, and hold harmless AirBM from any claims by you, your family, your lawyer, or anyone you've ever met.

You will indemnify us for claims arising from: your actions, your inactions, your presence, your absence, and your general existence.

Indemnification includes: legal fees, settlement costs, judgments, fines, regulatory penalties, and the cost of reputation repair PR campaigns.

This indemnification survives: termination of services, your death, the dissolution of AirBM, and the eventual heat death of the universe.

6. WAIVER OF CLAIMS

Should you bring a claim despite this waiver, you agree to pay all legal fees, court costs, and the emotional toll on our legal team.

You waive the right to bring any legal action against AirBM, even if we did something really, obviously, spectacularly wrong. Especially then.